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KISS & BLOG
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So in honor of life, I give to you,
the visual diary of blah |
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I was a wreck,
but I saw this coming.
Two weeks after he left,
no one was there -
those who claimed they would.
It's your expectations they said,
people aren't
But I don't understand;
You were good news.
You made me believe again.
Then when it all comes crashing down -
You ran.
You fled.
As I lie on the floor,
trying to catch my breath.
Tired from the weeping.
All the sadness;
I can't contain. Labels: breakdown, emotions, feelings, grieve, life, loss, love, reflections, sadness, thoughts, wounded |
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We went to the exposition at sundown today. Before heading home, we decided to sort out our purchases on one of the empty tables outside the diner. Whilst doing so, a seemingly harmless lad walked towards the table beside ours and started helping himself to the leftovers. He did that from table to table, hastily gobbling down all the leftovers he could find.
It was a sorry sight. My brother-in-law, witnessing this, immediately hands him a bag of Nacho chips we just bought. Uttering a muffled "thank you", he walked away at once without allowing us to render him additional assistance. This entire episode reminded me to be kind for everyone is indeed fighting their own battles in life and instead of judging from the sidelines, it's better to lend a helping hand when we can. Because judging doesn't help in any way, whereas lending a hand might mean the world to this person. In like manner, everyone can judge, but not just anyone have a heart big enough to put others first - much less a total stranger. Labels: act of kindness, giving, helping, judging, kindness, life, reflections, suffering, thoughts |
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Dear Ah Gong, it's been exactly one week.
I still can't believe you're gone. 
Everyone is still grieving, especially Ah Ma. It is an excruciatingly difficult time for the family. During your wake, I hope you saw the number of people who turned up; you would be happy knowing you've touched so many lives. Everyone came with a story of your kindness to tell - stories you never told. May you be at peace and find those you lost. Thank you for being the most wonderful grandfather I could ever ask for. Until we meet again Ah Gong, you live on in our hearts. I love you.
Some days I wake up feeling I might be okay, some days it feels like being okay is a long way off.
Labels: death, emotions, feelings, grandpa, grieve, life, loss, love, reflections, sorrow, thoughts |
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"Giving is being a doormat, and I'm very happy to be a doormat.
The door of my heart is open and every door has to have a mat.
So to open up my heart to other people,
you have to have the mat and they walk all over it.
Now that's not the answer people want.
But sometimes to help others, be willing to give your life for kindness."
- Ajahn Brahm
(How To Keep Giving Without Reward)
Sometimes, to see someone do something totally selfless gives us hope for our world. We are reminded that not everyone is in it for themselves and sometimes we too can be, a doormat. We can put our ego aside and allow ourselves to be hurt in the process as being kind and loving other people means we will get hurt. It's part of the deal, it's part of life.
Give, give, give. Hurt, hurt, hurt. Love, love, love; and every time it fails, never put your heart into a concrete bunker. You may feel safe in there, you won't get hurt but you're dead. You won't live.
Labels: ajahn brahm, buddha, emotions, feelings, giving, kindness, life, quote, reflections, thoughts |
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I wore my favorite colors for extra luck and head out with a spring in my step, feeling smug about the plan to surprise my sick boyfriend. But of course, "Miss Direction" just had to miss her directions tonight. After walking around helplessly for 30 minutes, I had no choice but to phone and ask him to search for me in his neighborhood.
Epic fail but I still think I deserve an "A" for effort. |
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"Although there is happiness in life, there is also suffering. The happiness seems so fleeting -
gone in no time only to be replaced by sorrow and discontent. Life itself, because it ends in death, is a tragedy. Someone once said life is like an onion: you peel it crying. The Buddha says birth is suffering because it leads inevitably to decay and death. We must understand this well. If we accept life we must accept death. If we want to cry when somebody dies, then we should also cry at his birth. For the moment a baby is born the seed of death is in him. But we are happy when a child is born. We laugh and congratulate the parents. If we understand birth - that it must lead to death - then when death comes we should be able to face it with a smile."
- Visuddhacara
Labels: birth, buddha, death, happiness, life, loss, quote, sorrow, suffering, visuddhavara |
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"In the end, we only regret the chances we didn't take,
relationships we were afraid to have,
and the decisions we waited too long to make."
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